Trying to See Clearly

Like Lemony Snicket, I was planning on sharing with you a series of unfortunate events.  A sordid tale of last Friday's unpleasantries and mishaps in the Gregson's outside sewer lines.  A post in which I would be pouty, and glum, and fish for sympathetic comments at the (now) far distant prospects of getting my new couch.  I had every intention of adding a farcical spin to the story about how some universal force must have placed this 3" rock into our exterior sewer lines. A rock that is now equivalent in value to several new pieces of furniture, or a trip to an exotic location, or a nice chunk of change in our withering savings account.

Blah, Blah, Blah-Bitty, Blah, Blah, Blah!!!

As I fired up my computer this morning and reviewed the list of blogs that I love to read, I saw it.  The post that has, most tragically, been a year in the making.  The post that took more courage and guts than I think I could ever muster.  You can see it here.

Many of you probably already know what I am talking about.  On August 14, 2008, a couple from Arizona was flying in a small plane with a friend.  The plane crashed.  The friend was killed but the young couple somehow survived. The husband and wife were severely burned and miraculously lived through the ordeal.  Stephanie, of the NieNie Dialogues,  was a very popular blogger before her accident and the blogging community rallied around her in her time of need. You may have seen stories on the local news or the Today Show.  The family had an outpouring of support and love from people all over the world. With the help of Stephanie's sister who kept her blog up and running even when she was in a coma, her blog continued and easily had over 10,000 hits on it daily.  

I, like thousands of others, followed Stephanie's story.  As a woman who was madly in love with life, she was such an example of femininity, of taking great pleasure in motherhood and being a wife, and having a solid foundation in our Savior, Jesus Christ.  It was such a pleasure to be able to peek into her world.  A world in which she chose to focus on the positive, and the beautiful, and tried to make her life what she wanted it to be - happy.

I wept this morning as I saw her picture.  Not because of the scars or the drastic change in her appearance, but because she has persevered and risen above such a tragedy.  Yes, she has admitted to the pain and to the dark nights, but she has shared her testimony and her incredible strength.  She counts her infinite blessings in every breath.  Tiny steps that bring her closer to her full recovery.  A figure of stoic bravery.

So, as I thought about the rock that had occupied so much of my energy over the weekend, I felt ashamed.  Here I was licking my wounds because of an inconvenience of time and money.  A superficial snag in my life.  A molehill that I had most certainly made into a mountain.

Sometimes, in this discombobulated head of mine, I lack in appreciation for what I have.  I often suffer from a dyslexic thinking error involving my wants and needs.  I think about all of the wants that I want.  What I don't have or what I can't afford or where I can't go or what I can't do.  Reality is, all that I need I've already got.  I have the gospel and its truths.  A loving and supportive husband who provides for our family.  Not lavishly or excessively but comfortably.  I have 4 amazing children who bless my life daily and who teach me patience, and kindness, and charity, and more patience.  Without them, our lives would be empty.  

We are alive.  We are healthy.  We love each other.  We are a family.

As I looked at Stephanie's new face and the true series of unfortunate events that she has gone through, I realized that I really need to look at my life and see it through a new set of eyes. Eyes like hers.  Eyes that see the tiny blessings that are bounteous all around me.  Eyes that focus on the simple abundance that our Heavenly Father provides us daily.  Eyes that see clearly - only true happiness comes in those things with eternal relevance.

And a couch isn't one of them.