Let me preface this post by saying that I love my boys. I really, really love them. I love them for their individual uniqueness, their diverse personalities and their ability to get me to the point of gritting my teeth one minute and melting my heart the next. I love them dearly. But I don't understand them. I don't get 'em. I try and try and try to figure out the male Psyche but it just doesn't make a bit of sense. Especially when it comes to the subject of cleanliness.
Example #1: My conversation with Brittan this morning:
Mom: Brittan, did you change your underwear today?
Britt: Um, no. I'll change it tonight.
Mom: No, you change it EVERY morning. Did you change it yesterday morning?
Britt; Um, no.
Mom: When's the last time you changed it?
Britt: Ummm....
Keep in mind that my boys get bathed regularly. I think they use soap. Sometimes, if I can't smell the fruity fragrance of the shampoo in their hair after they've showered , I will make them jump back in and rescrub. I provide clean clothes to my kids. I HATE doing laundry but I do it nonetheless and my kids have no excuse for not putting on fresh apparel. Especially underwear. They've been known to take a bath and put on the same dirty pair of unders that they were wearing before their sudsy soak. Ew, ew and triple ew!
What is it about boys and their lack of personal hygiene?
Example #2: A conversation between one of my nephews and his mom
(after unpacking his bag from scout camp and seeing a week's worth of clean socks untouched)
Mom: You didn't change your socks at all this week?
Nephew: I didn't know there were any in my bag.
Mom: Yeah, they were right next to your underwear.
Nephew: I had clean underwear in there too?
Again, ew!
Example #3:
When my brother-in-law was younger, the family spent a summer day at a pond/lake area. The water was somewhat stagnant and not terribly clean. Everyone played and swam in the water to keep cool. Several days later, my brother-in-law was the ONLY one who broke out in a rash. Upon some investigating, it was discovered that he was the only one who didn't (and still hadn't) showered. EW!
I know there is hope. Jeff is clean and neat. He's actually probably more of a germaphobe than I am. But when does this change occur? When do they realize that, YES, you need to wash your hands after cleaning the hamster cage and before you eat your lunch? When do they realize that, NO, it's not cool to smell like you've been crawling around on the cafeteria floor? And will they ever start feeling the grit, the grim, and filth under their fingernails?
Heavenly Father has blessed me with 3 wonderful sons. I know they'll be fine. I know they'll go out into the world and make me proud. I'll just follow along behind them with my can of Lysol.
5 comments:
I know what you mean. Orson the other day looked like he was growing green mold just under his lip, I told him we needed to wash his face. His reply was "I'm clean, I hate water, It's just M&M'S"
One Sunday while Reed was teaching his primary class he heard Orson screaming, so he hurried to see what was wrong well they were just trying to wash Orson's hands after the snack in nursery.
Hilarious post! And sadly enough, I have at least one daughter (who shall remain nameless) suffering from the same plight where hygeine is concerned!
I'm laughing, I'm gagging. I'm laughing, I'm gagging. I've nothing to offer in the way of hope...my oldest non-hygienic is THIRTY-EIGHT. I'm glad that Jeff pulled out of his boyish stinky spell but don't assume that all developmental paths will lead to that end. Jeff may be an exception!
I'm surprised - I think your boys look sooo well groomed and clean all the time!
But, I hear ya...I so don't understand boys! When I started out with TWO boys, I FEARED that's all I was gonna have...but, then I had three girls next, so I was spared!! It doesn't stop at hygeine...Do you know what my boys' rooms look like? What they eat like? What the floor under their seat at the Kitchen table looks like? The car after they rode in it? CAN YOU SAY, "PIG?!?" It drives me crazy -- and they TOTALLY don't even notice any of it!! That's what gets me!
I always ask my husband if he was like that - he says NO! really?
Although, I will say that ever since the Maturation Program at school where they told the boys to take showers and wear deodorant, Ryan has! I also get TONS of his laundry (& underwear) coming through - sometimes TOO much and I have to remind him that NOT everything gets dirty when you wear it, especially church pants that you wore for 3 hours only with no food involved! So, maybe that's when it all gets better!?
You make me laugh so hard! I love and miss seeing you. Man, the best is yet to come with Camden isn't it? And I think his nasty stinky diapers are bad right now... =)
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